A small piece of shameless self-promotion: if you haven’t already, do take a look at A long succession of thin evenings, the latest addition to my ever-expanding publishing empire. It’s a place for reviews of live music, theatre and comedy in London, and it’s an experiment in collaborative blogging. If you’d like to submit a review for publication there, let me know.
Archive for the ‘Communication’ Category
Also
December 17, 2009“I didn’t get where I am today…”
December 9, 2009I have just had the following exchange with my boss:
Him: Can I borrow a pen?
Me: What kind?
Him: A biro
I hand him a biro. Pause.
Him: Thanks. Can I keep it for…an hour?”
Me: You can keep it forever. There’s a whole stationery cupboard full of them just there. (I indicate the stationery cupboard.)
Him: Wow, really? Great!
I don’t know whether he’s never had to use a pen before, or has always used the same one which has just run out, or if he brings them from home, but I’m glad to have been the source of new and useful information.
All of which is a perfect way to introduce you, if you don’t know it already, to Good After-Morning!, as witty and terrifying a testament to the experience of working for someone very stupid as you’re ever likely to read. Since I’ve had a proper job I’ve been lucky enough to have uniformly kind and competent bosses, but in the dim and dark days of my early twenties I worked for someone who, whilst nothing like as awful as The Boss described therein, bore some striking similarities to her, so my sympathy is fully extented to the Silent Koala (but I do hope he keeps working for her and blogging about it).
LOLz
November 13, 2009Why has nobody told me about Lamebook? It involves pointing and laughing at real people so at best could be described as a guilty pleasure, but I’ve been giggling helplessly for an hour looking through its archive. I think this is my favourite so far (click to embiggen):
If you need cheering up, which I didn’t, I can’t recommend it highly enough.
Friday links
October 30, 2009Some linky fun for a Friday afternoon.
Pleasing: A polite exchange of letters (remember them?)
Interesting: pedestrians’ footsteps generate power in east London
Baffling: divorce cakes
Frightening: why it’s good to be scared
Frowning: glum councillors
Plus, here’s an uplifting song for a grey day:
Happy Halloween!
Lightning fail
October 28, 2009I wish that more people knew the difference between “lightning” and “lightening“, but even more than that, I wish that Hello magazine hadn’t got it wrong in the headline “The Obamas’ Lightening Trip to Denmark”.
(I read the article in question over somebody’s shoulder on the Central Line and I can’t find it online, but I will endeavour to buy a copy tomorrow so I can scan in the proof.)
A question of terminology
October 27, 2009The Today programme’s top news item this morning was the non-story that antenatal diagnoses of Down’s Syndrome are on the rise, partly because women are having babies later in life and partly because screening methods have improved over the last twenty years.
None of this seems very surprising, and I wasn’t sure why it was given top billing, unless the editors at Today are part of that humorous crowd who think that women are putting off parenthood because we’re selfish and (even worse) feminists, rather than because we think it’s important to have (a) careers which we can go back to now that one income cannot support a family and (b) relationships which are likely to last, our parents’ generation having been the first to see divorce as an acceptable alternative to unhappiness, and we as a result having seen more than our fair share of acromonious break-ups – and experienced at first-hand the effect they have on children. Or perhaps the Daily Mail would rather we get pregnant at the earliest opportunity and stay at home claiming benefits while we bring up our children single-handedly.
Sorry, where was I? Oh yes, Down’s Syndrome. It’s a sensitive subject because people’s responses to the idea of bringing up a child with Down’s vary wildly, and because it’s hard to know what one’s own response is likely to be until it happens. It’s probable, though, that there were people listening this morning who are wondering whether to have the test, or, having had it and received a Down’s diagnosis, are thinking about whether to continue with their pregnancy. That being the case, you would expect the programme to treat the subject with care.
In the segment I heard, John Humphrys interviewed Joan Morris, one of the researchers who had provided the latest statistics, and Jane Fisher of Antenatal Results and Choices (ARC), and I was struck by his repeated use of the word “abortion”, when both women used the less emotive alternative, “termination”. The two words have the same literal meaning, but “abortion” has developed a second metaphorical meaning of something ugly or awful, and in my mind it’s ready to be discontinued in its sense of ending a pregnancy. But a bit of googling reveals that that opinion is by no means universal, and I realise that just because a word has taken on a certain weight for me, it doesn’t mean it holds the same associations for other people.
There’s no guidance in the BBC’s style guide on the use of the word “abortion”; nor is there in the Guardian’s (my preferred source of arbitration, because it seems to have been written by real people who have spent time thinking about it). So I wonder: is my response to the word an unusual one, or is it genuinely dropping out of use? Is there a turning point at which we can say “this word is no longer considered appropriate”? And how can that measurement be taken? It’s all interesting stuff, and I think I’ll take a bit of time to find out more about words which have fallen out of currency, and whether it’s possible to reconstruct the process by which it happens.
But back to this morning’s show, into which Humphreys still managed to inject a bit of his customary heavy-handedness. Joan Morris had explained that although the percentage of parents who choose to terminate a Down’s pregnancy has remained stable, the number of terminations has increased in line with the higher number of diagnoses. Jane Fisher added that this was not new information, since we already know that more pregnancies are resulting in Down’s diagnoses, and that a certain proportion of those end in terminations. At this point Humphrys jumped in with “does that imply that you think too many women are having abortions?”, which apart from bearing no relationship to what either woman had said, was an extraordinarily crass attempt at creating controversy where there wasn’t any.
I always feel a little as though I’m watching Chris Morris starting a war between Australia and Hong Kong when I listen to John Humphrys on Today. It irritates me when I can’t hear what guests are saying because he’s drowning them out by arguing every point, however insignificant. But irritating your listeners is one thing. Attempting to scare up a controversy over a subject that is already difficult, and about which many listeners will have strong personal feelings, is pointless and unforgivable. I wish they’d retire him from the radio and leave him to present Mastermind, where I think he does an admirable job (unlike Paxman, whose feigned astonishment whenever a University Challenge team fails to answer a question he thinks they should know grows more wearisome every week).
Asterisks
October 26, 2009Ocado gave me their customary free copy of the Times this weekend. I like the Times, and would probably buy it over – or as well as – the Guardian, if only it weren’t owned by that awful little man.
But reading an article on The Thick of It reminded me that the Guardian is still the only paper with a grown-up attitude towards swearing. When you’re printing long quotes from the script, asterisking out every other word renders it almost unreadable and stamps heavily on any humour that might have once lurked in the lines.
It also introduces an ambiguity about what was actually said, which in some cases makes it sound worse than it really is. The missing c-word in the quote below is actually “cock”, but the asterisk version allows the reader to infer an alternative which is much more unpleasant and a lot less funny:
“I will remove your iPod from its tiny nano-sheath, and push it up your c***. And then I’ll put some speakers up your a*** and put it on to ‘shuffle’ with my f****** fist…”
Thus the Times’s attempt at protecting our delicate sensibilities actually makes the joke more offensive. I would also hazard a guess that anyone interested in a piece about The Thick Of It can probably cope with a few swears.
Annoying advert
October 19, 2009I keep seeing this on various US blogs:
I’m annoyed that I have to look at “flat belly” ads at all, but I’m ten times more annoyed by that first “of”. Is it a standard US usage now? Can we ask them to stop?
A reply!
October 19, 2009I’m pretty sure this is a form letter, but I’m nonetheless cautiously impressed to have received a reply from the Daily Mail today:
Thank you for your correspondence re the Jan Moir article. We welcome feedback-whether positive or negative- about the paper and our writers.
Our Columnist’s views have prompted a widespread response and debate. You may also be interested in the column by Janet Street-Porter in today’s edition.Thank you for taking the trouble to send us your own point of view.
Yours sincerely,
Managing Editor’s Office
I read the Janet Street Porter article and they were right, it was interesting. I’d still like to see a genuine apology from Jan Moir, but in the continuing absence of that it’s heartening to see that the paper is willing to publish a different view, and that the PCC is investigating last week’s piece. The Daily Mail will never become my newspaper of choice, and I’ve no doubt that they’ll continue to publish hateful opinions from people I disagree with, but it’s good to know that a spontaneous response from so many people last week has actually resulted in action being taken. A small victory is still a victory.
“a repulsive nobody writing in a paper no one of any decency would be seen dead with”
October 16, 2009That was Stephen Fry’s description on Twitter of Jan Moir, who has written this extraordinarily hateful piece in the Daily Mail today. I’ve just sent the Mail the following complaint. I’m not expecting a reply, but it’s made me feel better:
Shame on you for publishing today’s poisonous, under-informed, illiterate article on Stephen Gately by Jan Moir.
The circumstances of Gately’s death are still unclear. That being the case, speculation on Fleet Street may well be rife but there’s no excuse for making such unsubstantiated, homophobic and uneducated views public in a way that can only distress further the family and friends of the dead man.
There are many cases every year of sudden death in apparently healthy young people. The causes are myriad and it’s always devastating for those left behind. The only official indication we have of what caused Gately’s death suggests natural causes. But frankly, even if there were drink, drugs or sex involved, how on earth does Moir jump from that to her breathtaking claim that his sexuality or, unbelievably, his civil partnership, is to blame? It’s ungrounded, insulting and stupid.
And why on earth does she feel the need to be rude about Gately as a singer? What wrong has he done her to deserve this rancid poison, other than being a gay man? He had an unremarkable but perfectly good singing voice, so this:
A founder member of Ireland’s first boy band, he was the group’s co-lead singer, even though he could barely carry a tune in a Louis Vuitton trunk
is just spiteful and silly. And this:
He was the Posh Spice of Boyzone, a popular but largely decorous addition
demonstrates that Moir has no idea what the word “decorous” means. If you’re going to publish offensive drivel like this, then at least proofread it beforehand.
I was already reading in open-mouthed astonishment when I got to this gem:
After a night of clubbing, Cowles and Gately took a young Bulgarian man back to their apartment. It is not disrespectful to assume that a game of canasta with 25-year-old Georgi Dochev was not what was on the cards.
Actually it is extraordinarily disrespectful. Moir is making assumptions based on her own unreconstructed, stereotyped view of gay men. How dare she? And how dare you publish this rubbish?
I have no idea what goes on in what passes for Moir’s mind, but there’s no place for her seedy little fantasies in a piece published by a national newspaper.
If you’ve any guts you’ll publish a front-page apology and retraction tomorrow, and ask your journalists to keep their horrid, narrow-minded bigotry to themselves. And whatever happens, I hope that when Jan Moir dies you’ll publish a similarly hateful, spiteful article on the possible causes. After all, we all know what seedy lives journalists live, don’t we?